Today I’m being asked what makes me happy. I came into this blog post today absolutely positive that I had an answer for this, but the more that I think about it, the more I’m not so sure what things genuinely make me happy.

Obviously, my little family makes me happy. My husband and my daughter are both sources of immense happiness (and immense frustration). That’s an easy answer. The less easy answer is what makes me happy that is my own.

I play video games, but while that brings me joy, it also brings me frustration.

I work on my hobbies, but I don’t have enough space, or even a private space, to enjoy them. So I don’t think they truly bring me the level of happiness that they have the potential to. I don’t ever seem to have time to read, and when I finally do have the time to read, I’d rather spend that precious time doing something else. I don’t have the time to really commit to graphic design/web design like I used to, so my Photoshop remains unused most of the time.

Alternatively, puppies and kittens make me happy, almost always. Most baby animals do, because I’m a simple person. But that’s not really something that creates lasting happiness. It’s just a moment of, “Aww.” and then you’re like, oh, I’m stressy depressy again.

So I think, when it comes to happiness, it’s almost always fleeting right now. I get small bursts of, “Oh! This is happy!” and then it’s gone. I can’t sustain. I know that living where we do has a lot to do with it — second floor apartment, miles and miles away from all of the things to do/our friends, no creative freedom (re: apartment), every space is a shared space with my entire family. I’m hoping that once we move and I am able to curate a space that really is my own and isn’t in the midst of everyone else, I’ll be in a better space and find my sustainable happy.